Good and healthy relationships are created when people realize that differences make people and life interesting. Relationships work when people learn to base relationships on sharing. Communication is the most important key to good relationship.
Ask your partner to write down what makes him/her feel loved and special. Do the same for yourself. Exchange lists. Then, every day, no matter how you feel about him or her, do one loving/caring behavior for your partner!
You will both need security, comfort. A good relationship is built on compromise and a great deal of give and take on both sides.
Every morning make a conscious commitment to eliminate blame, criticism, and invalidation from your side of the relationship. If it leaks out, acknowledge it, and apologize to your partner.
Every relationship is a tangle of projection, transference and a dose of denial. It's as if your partner is holding a mirror to your face and shows you what you hate most about yourself. The earlier you can stop blaming and start talking the better you'll feel.
Learn from your mistakes. When something goes wrong and the two of you work through it, do not repeat the same mistake. Rather than dive right back into whatever it was you did or said, think before you act. At first, this will take some discipline but as you see positive results in the relationship, be encouraged that it is working.
Tips On How To Have A Good Relationship
- Start a memory box to store old movie tickets, brochures from cities visited, concert ticket stubs, old ski lift passes, cards attached to flowers received, old love notes or letters, birthday cards or anniversary cards from your mate, anything that the two of you did together.
- Keep your dependence and independence in balance. Tell and show your partner how much you need him, but don't cling, as that can make your partner feel trapped.
- Never go to bad mad at each other. Try to patch things up or call it a truce before the bedtime. It will give you time to calm down and in the morning everything will seem in different light.
- Accept that it's your job to educate your partner about what makes you feel most loved. Love your partner how they want to be loved, not how you want to be loved.
- Try doing something fun together at least twice a month and don’t forget to compliment each other. Don’t focus on your partner’s negatives boost up the positives and you’ll see them work on the negatives on their own. People already know what their faults are they don’t need anyone to tell them.